I was just sent this....
SUBJECT: YOU RUINED MY LIFE, MY LEGACY, AND THE INTERNET ITSELF
Horseplop.com “Moderation” (and I use that term VERY loosely),
I am FURIOUS.
Not “slightly annoyed.”
Not “miffed.”
NUCLEAR-LEVEL ANGRY.
My anonymous identity—carefully cultivated over YEARS of bad takes, grudges, and half-remembered rumors—has been EXPOSED, and I hope you understand that this is basically WORSE than any crime ever committed.
Do you have ANY idea what you’ve done?
I was supposed to be:
A shadowy insider
A feared keyboard assassin
A man with “connections”
Instead, I’m now just… some guy.
A guy with a posting history.
A guy with patterns.
A guy whose “sources” are apparently his own imagination and one pissed-off relative.
UNACCEPTABLE.
Because of YOUR FAILURE:
People are laughing at me
Quoting my own posts back at me
Asking QUESTIONS (which I refuse to answer)
I DID NOT spend years rage-posting anonymously just to be recognized as the same person who “always types like this” and “seems weirdly obsessed with the same three people.”
I DEMAND IMMEDIATE ACTION:
Delete anything connecting my username to reality. REALITY IS SLANDER.
Ban everyone who noticed. Especially the smart ones.
Restore my authority as a man who “knows stuff” without ever proving it.
Retroactively make me right about everything, including things I contradicted myself on.
And don’t you DARE suggest this is my fault for:
Oversharing
Repeating the same stories
Posting at the same hours
Or having the emotional restraint of a shopping cart in a hurricane
I am NOT responsible for consequences.
That’s for OTHER PEOPLE.
If this situation is not corrected immediately, I will:
Threaten lawsuits I don’t understand
Claim censorship
Announce I’m “done with this site” while still posting daily
Create three new anonymous accounts that mysteriously agree with each other
Let it be known:
I AM NOT EMBARRASSED.
EVERYONE ELSE IS JUST JEALOUS AND STUPID.
Fix this now—or enjoy watching me spiral publicly while insisting I’m winning.
FURIOUSLY,
Anonymous Gaagoots Stephen (But Apparently Not Anymore, Thanks a Lot)
