Funny Stories at the Track

[whiptherabbit]

I’ll start with one of my favourites. A guy asked me to give him $1 to buy himself a soda. I said here you go, then 1.3 seconds later he asks to split a Quinella with the $1 instead. I said sure, you pick a horse & I’ll pick a horse. He takes the rail horse whose 2/5 I take #7 at 25-1… We hit the ticket for $60 payout, $30 each. I said awesome, now you can buy a pop and a bite to eat and do some gambling.

Next race is on the tv being simulcasted, he takes his $30 and bets it to show on a 3/5 shot who finished up the track, ranted and raved like a lunatic then asked if I could give him $1 for a pop, told him water is free in the rest room…

[FirstUpFrom8Hole]

  .   Every track has a bunch of these guys running around. They also like to hang out by the winners circle and ask the drivers if we've decided who's going to win the next race yet.

[camfan12]

A few friends and I go to the Little Brown Jug every year. My one buddy is always broke by Thursday. So he asks me to hold $200 and to not give it to him no matter what he says until Thursday morning. I know him so well that I tell him only if I can video the transaction with my phone. He agrees and I video him saying "No matter what I say do not give me my $200 until Thursday morning"

So on Wednesday late after noon he is broke and drunk and wants his money... he has "hot one" and needs to bet it!

I play him the video... he calls me a fucking asshole and walks away mad cause I wont give him his money!!!

On Thursday I give him the $200 and he makes enough to cover his trip... fast forward to the next year and I ask him "hey you want me to hold some money for Thursday?"
He says "no thanks you fucked me last year"... needless to say he is broke by Thursday and looking to borrow.

[Lance]

 I have a great story I'll post when I have time. It involved an old horse trailer, a gaiting strap, a headpole and bucket of Hooflex.

[Frank the Zipper]

Not so Funny.......

Rideau Carleton back in the "70's. As usual I talk to my driver/trainer about my horse's chances in the next race. He tells me that the Quebecois Mafia have fixed the race & tells me to bet $40 to win for him on their horse.

Top of the stretch, my horse leads by 5 & the fix horse (Leg's D.) is nowhere to be found. My horse (D.M} wins & pays $15.

[WTF Hanover]

Vernon Downs, late 1980's. My buddy and I are down at the fence as the horses are scoring down before the race. Driver Fred Sheats is going by us kind of close the fence, so I yell out to him "Hey Freddy is your horse any good tonight", and he responds out one side of his mouth with "Sheeeeeeeiiiit". So every time I went to the track that season and Freddy had one racing I'd go down to the fence and ask if he was any good that night. Got the same response every time until the one time he didn't say shit when I asked and he subsequently won at 8-1.

[The collector]

I first found out how good of a handicapper Whiptherabbit was when I watched him pick 12 races over couple of days 11 winners 1 2nd I bet a few because I forgot because I got hot betting Hoosier so I charted them and told my Buddy he looked an believed me. I’m guessing he was a jinx because whip got cold for about a minute. He stopped following hahaha so he said but every time after that if he hit a pik 3-4-5 I’d look sure enough whip had picks that day. I thought the guy who taught me how to handicap and actually win was the Best. Well he might have been in usa but whip. Is the best in Canada for sure.

[EPM]

Vernon Downs, late 1980's. My buddy and I are down at the fence as the horses are scoring down before the race. Driver Fred Sheats is going by us kind of close the fence, so I yell out to him "Hey Freddy is your horse any good tonight", and he responds out one side of his mouth with "Sheeeeeeeiiiit". So every time I went to the track that season and Freddy had one racing I'd go down to the fence and ask if he was any good that night. Got the same response every time until the one time he didn't say shit when I asked and he subsequently won at 8-1.

use to drive truck and make deliveries.thats how i met him..he was hooked up with Alice Root who use to drive in races from time to time..think they are doing pretty good with therapy horses for the handicaped

[Jctoronto]

Hot August sat night Greenwood Raceway Toronto
Late 80s.   Big sat night crowd.

My best harness buddy there a blind guy with cane..the late and 'one of a kind' great RIcky Muzzo (lotta toronto harnessers knew him)
Gregarious and full of life.,he'd pick 'em strictly off tone of  overhead tv set announcer analysts. He played every week, so he knew those ponies well.
On this sweltering night, he decided on his $10/10 w/p pick, and as always id walk with him from the apron and guide him inside to long mutuel lines. But on this night, a power failure hits..a total hit, with a few faint generator lights activated. Crowd inside acts in stunned fashion..loud and a bit panicky but willing to wait in their gambling spot in line....Taking it all in and without missing a beat, my blind buddy, with two tens in his left hand, says 'did something
happen?'

No Ricky..just another night at the track

we lost him during covid..early 60s.
r.i.p.sir.

[EPM]

went into the bar that was just down the road from the track..few horsemen in there..Action Jackson tells the girl that was helping out in the kitchen he will give her a hundred to show her Titts..she flashes for a second he peels her off a hunge..next morning he's passing by my barn says he had a good time last night but he don't know how he went thru so much money..he goes I know I gave that girl 10 to show her boobs..I go no you gave her a hunge he goes that explains that

[bestbetter]

I was walking into Hazel Park to make my bets in the 90's one night.  A black dude was walking out, We both had the same attire on down to the shoes, He says "Hell no". I said what does your ole lady look like...LOL

[bestbetter]

One night at Hazel Park I went to sit on the end of a bench where the horses walk out to the track. There was a gentleman in a suit sitting at the other end. A big dude walks up to me grabs the program out of my hands and it gives to the gentleman. He begins handicapping my program making different comments as he wrote down picks. Needless to say, I immediately got up knowing I made a mistake sitting down their...

[Easy Irv]

Didn't Hazel Park have great roast beef sandwiches!

[Mailbox Money]

Not sure if it was actually roast beef but it was darn good, that's for sure!

[hasbeen]

Got dozens but here's a Sportsmans 1. A buddy is a groom staying in a tackroom at Spk. Says if you're coming out tonight (Saturday) I heard on a horse in the pipe-in (lone simulcast race, in this case the Maple Leaf Trot from Mohawk). I had a college reunion picnic earlier and asked him if he wanted to go. So I stop at my office to pick up some $ to bet with and head to Spk to drive him to the picnic. Get thru the west side and some  in his beat up Caddy stops short at Madison and Austin in the hood. I tap his bumper and have to pay him off 1/2 my bankroll so he doesn't make a big deal.
P/U a 1/2 barrel and go to the picnic. 1 hour before leaving for the track, we start playing craps. I booked all the bets. Guy made 2 9s, 2 10s, and an 8. Cleaned me out of all but $10.
Was 1/2 in the bag driving back to Spk and forgot to stop at home for my emergency $100.
Earl (Christoforou) was 3/5. The tip was on Bill Gale and Program Speed. I bet the $10 to win. Top of the stretch, Gale is nowhere. Deep stretch here's a shadow on the far outside. Beats Earl at the wire. $27 and the EX with Earl is $100.
With the $300 I had, that's at least $50 WP and the EX for $20 - minimum!
Classic fuckup.